To Thine Own Self Be Zoo

Volume 1
Issue 1
Issue 2
Issue 3
Issue 4
Issue 5
Issue 6
-Issue 7-
Issue 8
Issue 9
Issue 10
Issue 11
Issue 12
Issue α

Volume 1,
Issue 7

Personal Ghosts


This One Shall Breathe Somewhere Else

Empathy Farm




I sit down and pee

and you come and drink from the bathtub faucet

and I pet you.


You drink from the bathtub faucet

and I drink from the sink faucet.


I drink from the bathtub faucet

feeling happy to do like you.


I stand in front of the mirror and brush my teeth

and you come in and lie down with me

so we can keep each other’s company

even in this.


I enjoy when we have chance to share our bathroom together.

I’m happy that you seem to enjoy it too.



Factual Dog Status Awareness

Sometimes I am very aware that I’m dating a dog.

That the person I’m kissing,

Whose tongue is exploring the depths and corners of my mouth,

Is a dog.

That the person I’m spooning with,

Holding and embracing their soft furry weight

Against my naked stomach and arms and legs and balls and hard on,

Is a dog.

That the person I’m cooking food for,

That the person I take ticks off of,

That the person I let outside to pee and poop,

Is the person I’m dating

And that person is a dog.

Every time I think of it,

I am reminded of how lucky I am.



Ambiguously Grammatical

“Pet a dog with a boner.”

A misplaced modifier

that, to be fair,

sounds like a good time either way.



Not All The Time Of Course But Sometimes

Dogs have sex sometimes,

They totally do.

Don’t believe it,

Research where puppies come from.




Suck a dick, bust a nut

Have a fun night with your mutt



Yet Another New And Happy Morning

Today I woke up in a white dress I had bought and worn the night before (I have a penis)

and I snuggled a dog (he has a penis).

We hung out

and then when I had to pee I went to the bathroom and did that

and cupped both of my hands together towards the end

and caught some of the last of it

and had a sip, as much as I had caught.

I had taken off the dress at some point,

probably right before the piss thing.

I washed my hands with soap and water twice

and then me and my dog went on a walk

after I changed into jeans and a girl shirt

with a zipped up, comfortable, nice looking grey sweatshirt over the top.

We took the route that my dog decided he wanted to go on that morning

while I had piss on my breath (my dog drank some water before we left).

When my dog took a shit I picked up what he had dropped

because it keeps the parks a nicer place.

I dropped the disposable bag of dog crap into a trash bin that I found before we went back inside.

Inside I drank a glass of water and my dog ate a bowl of dry dog food and wet dog food mixed together for breakfast.

New days, new combinations of old things.

Live well and live free.




Lookin at your claws

They’re fucking awesome dude


Most within Volume I written by Eggshell Ghosthearth.

This website contains works of literature, including narrative fiction, creative nonfiction, and poetry. Within this literature, any resemblances to any existing copyrighted materials, trademarks, or persons is completely coincidental, or is used for artistic purposes within the bounds of Public Domain, Fair Use, or Public Figure Status. Much of the literature on this site contains themes of sexuality, though is at no point intended to be pornographic. To Thine Own Self Be Zoo is a personal project and is not a for-profit endeavor.